Emotionally empty

Vacant voids of listless eyes stare at reflections that no longer try, after flying to such a height and sinking to such a low you only can sigh, rather than a hello you would rather say goodbye, and you lose the ability to pull it all together to even apply. Everything that was sharp is now flat and dull, you don’t even feel the chemicals that pass through your skull, and you have hit the soft ever-living null. You remember what it was like to feel such love, now the hand has outgrown the glove, and you just want your pulse to stop so you can ascend above. This is the apex of nothing and the low of everything that exists, the memories of the pain remain as scars on your wrists, and your feet still move one in front of the other because your life persists.

You can’t even remember the days that life used to fill you with joy, now all you seem to want to do is slowly destroy, and this is what it is like when you are life’s emotionless whipping boy. The silence of the empty room that is the only place you prefer to reside, long ago the passion that filled your soul has died, because now you are nothing inside. Life has become an unwrapped present, you are the brand new car with the giant dent, and when you can’t feel anything at all it is the biggest torment. Your phone sits silent on the table when it used to ring, you are no more than a jester to please a king, and that person in the mirror is just a lifeless thing.

You are just a husk of organs that slowly decay, the dancer in a wheelchair at the ballet, and with each blow life delivers you slowly lose your way. People that used to be friends don’t even want to see your face, you did not have enough stamina to finish the race, and now you just orbit any feeling in outer space. You have become nothing but numb, the colors in your life are nothing but grey that is glum, and this emptiness will never leave you because this is what you have become. You are emotionally empty just like the rest, you don’t even fight it anymore nor do you protest, and although your nerves may be working they are in a constant state of unrest.

By Zachary Philip Freeman

 Grey day © Jyothy Rose